ARE YOU READY TO FINALLY STOP MAKING NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS?

Aren’t you sick of New Year’s resolutions? Each year we plan and set goals and within a couple of weeks, we have dropped them.

How frustrating is that?

I mean every year I choose to exercise and then I never follow through.

I feel like such a slug.

So what makes a person choose the new year to begin again?

It makes sense - new year, new you!  We have all bought into that marketing slogan. The hype for new year resolutions begins in early December. We are already stressed about shopping and planning for a big holiday. Notions such as - we better spend lots or we will disappoint people.  We must eat all those wonderful treats even if it means water retention, weight gain, and new holiday outfits that magically shrink.

I hate when that happens, don't you?

Where do those clothes shrinking closets actually come from I wonder?? Oh well....

Then the feeling of shame settles in and we must do something. Seriously how could we not? So we pick something which is making us feel unhappy. I better lose my holiday weight so I can get into those new outfits. Or this year I am finally going to start exercising because it is what I "should" do. I am going to finally get a higher paying job so I can clear out the Christmas debt.

Yes; I will do it!  

It will be easy because there is always that new year 7-week program to help. Right?

We have all been there. The promise of a program and the disappointment of the outcome. Why?

It appears other people achieved success. Why am I such a failure at this? Every year it is the same
darn thing.  Well, what if it is because we are misaligned in our focus?

So for me each year it is about the exercise. Yes, I am going to be a yoga guru by years end. I shall be a supple pretzel bendy warrior posing guru.... or maybe I will just wait until I look better in my yoga gear.

Another year and the plan is over before it actually got started.

Why is that I wonder?

I keep thinking I need to improve. So why not chose health after all. Isn’t it what everyone is doing? It is important so I better get on the bandwagon.

A new year, a new you!

But really is it a ‘new’ you? Or, is it an old you with the same hidden stories and the same non-results.

Don’t you deserve better?

When we are looking to change something in our life it requires some curiosity.

The question now becomes - why do I want to make this change?

Is it to become healthier? Or am I following a suggestion of someone else’s idea that everyone must have 20 minutes a day of exercise?

So if it is because you wish to get healthier that is wonderful.  Get the snazzy new yoga gear and start. If it is because "everyone should" have 20 minutes a day for exercise; take a pause and think...am I everyone? Do I feel comfortable taking 20 minutes a day for exercise?

If the answer is ‘yes’ - go ahead with your plan.  If the answer is ‘no’, the next question is how much time am I comfortable with?  If you find no amount of time rings your bell then, ask another question.

Why am I not comfortable taking time for me?

Now it starts feeling juicy; doesn't it?  It does not matter if it is exercise, weight loss or debt reduction, it all boils down one thing.  If you don't feel comfortable about doing something for your benefit it just won't get done. Self-sabotage will set in and excuses start multiplying faster than the interest rate on your unpaid credit card.

It is not about the exercise, it is about what I feel about myself. I may discover I do not feel I am worthy of taking time out of my busy day just for me. Heavens; who do I think I am! Putting myself first, really! Hmmm. Now that’s interesting.

The reason I fail is that I have not started with a self-care plan. Having a plan in place about time for me. I need to pivot to be in agreement with taking ‘me time’ before I can commit to a yoga regime.

I need to make sure I am on board with this decision on the unconscious level too. By saying something and buying the equipment does not make it so.

Discovering where we are feeling unfulfilled can shed light on why you have chosen this year's resolution and then take action.

Is there an alignment to the area of where you are feeling satisfied and to your new years' resolution choice?

A simple exercise can be:
Write down 6 categories on your life

• Health
• Intimate Relationships
• Fun & Friendship
• Career
• Finance
• Spiritual path and purpose

Next think briefly what a satisfying life might look like for you in each area. Choose a value between 1 (very dissatisfied) and 10 (fully satisfied) of where you are feeling satisfied in each of the areas. Write the score alongside.

Now take a little time and write down your thoughts on the following questions:

1. How do you feel about your life as you look at your scores?
2. What would make that a score of 10?
3. What would a score of 10 look like?
4. Which of these categories would you most like to improve?
5. How could you make space for these changes in your life?
6. What help and support might you need from others to make changes and be more satisfied with your life?
7. What change do you want to make first?
8. If there was one key action you could take that would begin to bring everything into balance, what would it be?
9. Now ask “do these questions and answers align with my resolution?”
10. What is the true reason for choosing this resolution?

For example, if the score shows your ‘health’ rates quite high why are you stressing on the exercising?

If the area of ‘fun & friendships’ rates low on the scale, then maybe taking a yoga class will help you meet new people and widen your circle of friends.

If the area ‘relationships or career’ rated low because of stress, perhaps participating in yoga a few times a week will help you relax.

Another perspective is  ‘why exercise’ when it is really the finances which are creating unhappiness. Ask some probing questions around your feelings on money and how your openness to receiving money will affect your personal evaluation. What area in your career do you feel unfulfilled and what is holding you back from making changes?

With clarity around the true feeling of being unfulfilled, you can easily align the reason why you might choose a specific resolution. And have better success at following through!

Clarity can be obtained when you understand yourself at your core. What your strengths and patterns are. Using the information from your Soul Genesis© profile will help you  understand where misalignment is, then pivot alignment to your true self.

This method of self-reflection and curiosity stops choosing new year resolutions randomly and supports you in making changes where misalignment is actually present.

2019 - the year to STOP making new year resolutions and start making aligned choices.

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I am happy to help!

I can’t help you with your yoga poses.

I can help support you take action towards change
and
 be in alignment with your year's new choices!

​Let’s connect with a free consult call.

Until next time,
Barbara