When something challenging was happening in my life, my mom would say to me - “Look around, there is someone else worse off!"
I know her intention was to raise my spirits. She did not mean to create a limiting belief, but in fact, she did.
"Sorry mom in heaven; but as you know, I call it as I see it.”
I have also used the saying many times without a thought of the energy and vibration I was sending out into the world. Not to mention what I was teaching others.
Not too long ago, I was doing some inner reflection work. I was thinking about some of the events in my life, where I thought, “well it wasn’t as bad as yours.” Or was it? Was I being fair to myself to dismiss the effect of my events on my life? I know it impacted my present and my future.
Have you found yourself pushing aside your feelings? Dismissing an experience by comparing it to someone else’s? Perhaps making sure you did not make too much of it?
It is imperative to move through a situation to allow healing to occur. At the same time, it is about honouring the emotions that come up during and after. It is equally important not to hide or ignore the emotions to mask the pain.
Have you thought of an experience that perhaps was the most difficult in your life? Maybe you chose to ignore this event. Not wanting it to become a story in which your future life perspective was built on. Your reasoning was; to recall the experience would continue the pain.
You may discount the experience by diminishing the intensity of the repercussions the event had to avoid identifying with victimhood. The perception of being a victim comes from your inner voice. It's whispering about a weakness rather than an actual view of your courage and strength.
It is quite a dilemma, isn't it?
We may be told, "Just get over it." “Move on already, it happened so long ago”.
This might seem like a good way to heal from an emotional event. But if it is not addressed, it actually can cause us to remain stuck in the emotion.
The results may not appear until many years later. This can show up as ill-health, unexplained anxiety, and panic attacks. Emotional imbalances that never seem to even out. The list can be quite long and the effects appear to be on a looping pattern.
It is only when an individual begins to explore the root cause of these symptoms and are traced back to an event (or series of events) does the awareness unfold.
We have patterns to respond to stresses. Part of our soul expression is to have built in responses to help us deal with traumatic events. Understanding these patterns not only helps us heal from the trauma but also to understand when the trauma is being created by an experience.
Is there an area of your life you are feeling stuck in? Do you have any health concerns that just won’t go away? Have you been participating in self-discovery and healing modalities for some time but you have not felt resolution?
To know a core wound is not to build a story on a life event. It is not to dismiss the pain by diminishing its importance, its intensity or by comparing it as a small “blip” in your life while raising the value of importance to a similar event for another person.
To become familiar with a core wound, its origins, how it became activated and how you have created ways to adapt; is all part of healing and moving through a painful event (past or present).
Are you looking to create more balance in your life?
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